When you feel as if you have lost your compass…

Can you embody a faith that you haven’t explored and dissected from the inside out?  Inquiring of the Lord unashamedly as you hunger and thirst for truth?  Is that not a part of spiritual maturity?  In these times of upheaval in our country, with the angst that COVID-19 is lurking around every corner, the politicization of this serious health pandemic, and the thunder of racial unrest colliding with what has been status quo, an unequal one for sure, I find myself searching for answers:  What would Jesus say?  What would Jesus do?  What do I believe?

I have always relied upon the Word of God for truth.  I still do.  In the last couple of years, even before the current atmosphere in our country, I have been seeking more deeply what it means to love Christ and to live for Him in the unique way he has created me. The last time I had questioned things that I had been taught was when I left the church of my childhood, one that had very legalistic views on who was saved and who was not, what was allowed and what was not.  It didn’t feel right to me, but Jesus met me where I was in my early years, and He was enough.

For most of my adult Christian life, I lived habitually, routinely, learning and growing, yes, but not asking the deeper questions as to what I was receiving. I was satisfied with my status quo, and wasn’t it wrong to question anyway? What would that say about me as a Christian?  Yet God again met me at every stage of growth in that season, and I’m very thankful for the good foundation in the Word I received.

My life began to change dramatically in the years preceding my becoming a widow and as a single lady.  God was my lifeline, the Rock that I clung to during all the upheaval surrounding that time in my life.  When I married Mark a few years later, we were immediately called to a healing ministry which has grown in depth to a place we both would have never imagined.  We have witnessed the ways of the Lord in his interaction with his broken children, always meeting them at their point of need and capacity to understand the truth He was giving.

We are made in the image of God; indeed, Scripture says we have the mind of Christ if He is our Lord.  He gave us our amazing brains to think and to reason, to contemplate.  Yet, it is only through the Spirit that we encounter Jesus in the pages of the Bible.  We learn how He interacts with man in all manner of circumstances. The Spirit is the one who shows us how to apply the truth in Scripture to the events of this fallen world.  In our natural mind, we are only lifting out verses, proof-texting, to justify the words to our own ends.

I’m disheartened because some of what I’ve been taught doesn’t line up with the ways of the Lord I have come to know in an intimate relationship with Him.  The purpose of the Word of God is to reconcile hearts to Him, so I’m puzzled because it seems that much of the body of Christ is not exemplifying love, but division. How did Jesus address the political unrest of the day in which He made His appearance on earth?  He didn’t address it.  He always redirected people to his kingdom saying, “My kingdom is not of this world.”  How did He address the social unrest of his day? He said to take care of the needs of people, to love your enemies, and to love one another.

I may not have it all figured out. I may be still questioning some things. But this is my true north:  I know Him.  My faith, my “belief system,” is a person—Jesus Christ.  Though these are unprecedented times for those of us now living, we have an anchor for our souls.  And it’s not a church doctrine or a political party or any single interpretation of the Scriptures.  Jesus IS the Word.  He is faithful to show us truth, to be our guiding light, if we will only look to Him. 

Sometimes when it feels as though we have lost our compass, it is only that God is leading us to a new path.